How to Be a Conscious Leader (Part 1)
How much longer can you afford to lean on reactive approaches before you realize that it’s time to engage in a conscious way of leading?
So, what is Conscious Leadership? Conscious leadership refers to guiding others with full awareness of the self and cultivating growth in organizations by supporting the people in them.
I was graciously invited by my friend, Ron Hill, to attend the Awakening Conscious Leadership Immersion Experience hosted by XCHANGE. The program is based on the work of Leading Well from Within: A Neuroscience and Mindfulness Based Framework for Conscious Leadership by Dr. Daniel Friedland.
There were an overwhelming number of insights and new awarenesses from just day one of three! I’ve decided to take it upon myself to reflect to help with my own learning. Processing and reflecting with this blog post is conscious leadership in action. This is not only helpful for me, but I am hoping this can inspire others into creative action.
Here are just three key takeaways from day one of the immersion experience with some of my personal ah-ha moments.
Awakening Conscious Leadership — Day 1
Takeaway #1 — The change you want to see in the world starts with you.
Our world is changing faster than we are equipped to change with it. We aren’t as prepared as we could be and the demands of us are greater than our resources. There’s not a playbook, but there is collective wisdom that we can tap into. We have the answers within us already, if we could just figure out a way to work better together. The old models of convening where only a few people (those at the top or the most formally educated) have the answers is outdated. What’s imperative is that we learn to gather better than before to unlock this collective wisdom. To make sure the system is able to thrive, we must thrive as individuals first. Enter conscious leadership training.
*A personal ah-ha moment — This so perfectly relates to the work I am passionate about doing and the purpose of the Culture First chapters (to improve the world by improving the places we work). We can’t change our workplaces by ourselves. No one person owns a culture. Managers and executives don’t just need leadership training. We all do! To transform a culture, it starts with having the willingness to reflect and grow, fostering belonging and acceptance, having the courage to be vulnerable and putting your learnings into action. The way I see my current role is to create spaces for people to reflect and grow then inspire them to take action in their relationships whether that is at work or at home.
Takeaway #2 — How you are showing up in your relationships matters.
When we step into any group setting, we need to be asking ourselves — am I showing up in a way that is giving energy to others? If not, why not? You’re likely the reason the group is coming down. We grow towards that which gives us life. Imagine a sunflower. When sunflowers grow, they face towards the sun. This is called the Heliotropic Effect. We can’t change others, but we can ourselves to show up to give more life which then will change the group dynamics.
A good reflection prompt — When have you been in a relationship that created a positive cycle of creativity? What was it you brought to the group? What did others bring to the group?
*A personal ah-ha moment — Recently, I saw a startup founder tweet: “It’s not my job to be my employee’s therapist. This isn’t what bringing your whole self to work means.” Sure, totally agree. However, it is your job to manage the energy of yourself and your team members. So, how might you channel that energy into achieving the collective goals? Reactivity is impacting your bottom line and costing you personally, specifically emotionally. It’s time to raise the Emotional Intelligence (EQ) of yourself and the organization, master self regulation and learn to create spirals of creativity rather than reactivity to unlock the group’s potential.
Takeaway #3 — Reactivity is inevitable. When we drift, we can consciously choose to shift. It starts with awareness.
Since our world is changing faster than we are prepared for and the demands of us are greater than our resources, it causes stress and self doubt which puts us into reactivity mode. Think fight/flight/freeze mode. This is the old brain stem taking over which is motivated to keep us safe. So what can we do? Enter mindfulness practices. This could look like breathing techniques, moving our bodies to shift our physiology or taking time to write and reflect. The key is to “Pause, Notice and Choose.”
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” — Viktor Frankl
*A personal ah-ha moment — In order for organizations to stay relevant and make money, they’ll need to innovate. Innovation is all sexy and fun until you realize the emotional labor involved. You can’t innovate without experiencing some reactivity mode (fight/flight/freeze). This is because it requires letting go of the old way of doing things and trying out new things. This is uncomfortable and can spook us! When we are worried about our safety, it causes us to make poor decisions. Employees worry about losing their jobs. VC-backed companies worry about their burn rate and executing quickly enough.
This reminds me of a hilarious quote from one of my favorite ‘Best/Worst’ TV show characters from Silicon Valley, Erlich Bachman: “we need to do what any animal in nature does when it’s cornered. Act erratically and blindly lash out at everything around us.”
This shit just happens. It’s part of the process, but when we experience an overwhelming amount of instability, chaos and fear, we can become accustomed to it. We act out erratically without even knowing it and get stuck in the cycle especially when we aren’t aware of our triggers. Then we start to unconsciously choose that for ourselves over and over again. Continuously inflicting that onto ourselves and others. Many business leaders and entrepreneurs like to say they “thrive” in the chaos. I call B.S. The busy culture and hustle porn has to go so we can find a more sustainable way of working. Employees are doing the individual work to operate at a higher level of consciousness and aren’t tolerating these kinds of cultures anymore. Individuals pick up workplace trauma that they’ll have to learn to unpack. Organizations will have to continue to invest in these people-focused efforts and keep up.
To sum up day one, if we are going to keep up with the rapid speed of change in the world, we’ll need to learn to work better together. We’ll need to gather better. We’ll need to ask better questions. We’ll need to do the personal work first. This requires greater levels of vulnerability and self-awareness. The world needs us and the answers are already inside of us. Let’s tune in and tap into it.
“All the science comes to a head if we can remember to be open, kind and curious.” — Dr. Daniel Friedland
